If grades aren't everything
Then why do I study so hard
Only to fail?
If looks aren't everything
Then why do I dress comfortably
Only to be judged?
If personality is everything
Then why do I try so hard
To be a better person
When everybody only cares about
My grades and how I look
~ Kimmie ~
Project or no project, keep posting your work!
ReplyDeleteThey're good.
If you don't mind, I was thinking...
That maybe you could add a question mark after the last line of your stanzas, "Only to fail" and "Only to be judged".
I mean I don't know how you were thinking of it turn out, so it's just a suggestion, that the rhetoric questions could perhaps add more emphasis and meaning... :S
Also, is it supposed to be "by judged"?
Just change that if it were a mistake (:
Thank you so much :)
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks for your advice! I agree about the question marks; I'll add that to it. And, yes "by judged" was a mistake, I'll fix it.
Hahahaah our studying for English Literature made us like this and observant, don't mind us. xD
ReplyDeleteHaha, don't worry.. I actually love the feedback. :)
ReplyDelete